I am studying a book I just recently bought called "The Way Of The Mystic". On week two, I read through a section that had a Guided imagery exercise that was so insightful. Basically you have to imagine you are on a beach and a descended master appears. He points to a cave that you have never seen before and a child comes walking out.The child walks up to you and you ask "What can I do to make our life happy?" The child climbs into your lap and responds.... The child is you. Then a teenager walks out . You ask again "How can I make our life happy?", and then an old woman. These people are you in different stages of your life and nugget of knowledge that each aspect carries. This exercise became a wake up call for me, especially the old woman. There seemed to be a common theme and that theme is fear and sadness, and lack of self importance and self love.
The child reminded me to be free, to have fun, the laugh, smile and embrace each moment. The teenager reminded me of the consequences of fear and not to run from my inner emotions. As an Empath this is difficult, because I tend to get hurt very easily, and tend to make alot of bad choices because of the emotions. So now, as I'm older I'm afraid to feel wholeheartedly because I'm afraid or hurt, failure, and disappointments. I was a fighter, I fought for justice, I fought for what I believed what was right, but I never fought for the most important thing of all, I never fought for love. I cried out for it and when I got it, I ran to the hills. Again, fear. The teenager reminded me to fight for what I truly believe in, the things and people who are most important, and to not be afraid to open my heart to these people.
The old woman, I will write down what she told me.
"Listen to the children. Life goes by quicker than you know. Embrace the moment and each experience. We are not cursed, but blessed.. if you remember that love and compassion for everyone is all that matters. All the years of depression has done me no good, simply wasted empty time. Sure I learned alot, grew alot, and helped some people along the way, but I did nothing to heal myself. And now I'm so tired, always tired.To Tired to play with the grand kids and to depressed to truly care. I'm an old bitter woman who feels I have accomplished nothing. You can still change our fate. Open your heart,my dear. Not for a brief moment, but always. The lesson I never learned that you still can, is to love yourself. God dous. Alot of other people do to, why can't you? We have a heart that has never been truly freed from it's cage.I never really knew love to it's fullest potential because I was to afraid. I always wanted to be an author, but never had enough confidence that it would be good enough to be published. I always wanted to love without restraint. To live a long happy life with my soulmate, but was to afraid of being vulnerable to truly give my all. I never really appreciated life and all the people who were closest to me until they were gone. The cycle of depression and failure always continued because I never believed that I could make a change, nor did I believe that my life was all that important. Now my children cry upon my grave and for the first time I realized that my life did make a difference to them. I wish I could go back and tell them. I wish I had one more chance to embrace life. Your my second chance. Don't leave this life as I have. Don't mourn the things that you don't have, but embrace the things that you do have.
I don't want to die like that. I have envisioned this woman before. I have seen her in my future and fear that I will end up like that. But there is still time to take chances, there's still time to change that woman, myself. There is alot we can learn from our ghosts.
The child reminded me to be free, to have fun, the laugh, smile and embrace each moment. The teenager reminded me of the consequences of fear and not to run from my inner emotions. As an Empath this is difficult, because I tend to get hurt very easily, and tend to make alot of bad choices because of the emotions. So now, as I'm older I'm afraid to feel wholeheartedly because I'm afraid or hurt, failure, and disappointments. I was a fighter, I fought for justice, I fought for what I believed what was right, but I never fought for the most important thing of all, I never fought for love. I cried out for it and when I got it, I ran to the hills. Again, fear. The teenager reminded me to fight for what I truly believe in, the things and people who are most important, and to not be afraid to open my heart to these people.
The old woman, I will write down what she told me.
"Listen to the children. Life goes by quicker than you know. Embrace the moment and each experience. We are not cursed, but blessed.. if you remember that love and compassion for everyone is all that matters. All the years of depression has done me no good, simply wasted empty time. Sure I learned alot, grew alot, and helped some people along the way, but I did nothing to heal myself. And now I'm so tired, always tired.To Tired to play with the grand kids and to depressed to truly care. I'm an old bitter woman who feels I have accomplished nothing. You can still change our fate. Open your heart,my dear. Not for a brief moment, but always. The lesson I never learned that you still can, is to love yourself. God dous. Alot of other people do to, why can't you? We have a heart that has never been truly freed from it's cage.I never really knew love to it's fullest potential because I was to afraid. I always wanted to be an author, but never had enough confidence that it would be good enough to be published. I always wanted to love without restraint. To live a long happy life with my soulmate, but was to afraid of being vulnerable to truly give my all. I never really appreciated life and all the people who were closest to me until they were gone. The cycle of depression and failure always continued because I never believed that I could make a change, nor did I believe that my life was all that important. Now my children cry upon my grave and for the first time I realized that my life did make a difference to them. I wish I could go back and tell them. I wish I had one more chance to embrace life. Your my second chance. Don't leave this life as I have. Don't mourn the things that you don't have, but embrace the things that you do have.
I don't want to die like that. I have envisioned this woman before. I have seen her in my future and fear that I will end up like that. But there is still time to take chances, there's still time to change that woman, myself. There is alot we can learn from our ghosts.
No comments:
Post a Comment